Untangling ties

Today was THE day from hell. Not only did we forget to set the alarm so we could wake up in the morning, but we were running late. You know the panic that runs so high when you’re running late? Take that and multiply it thousandfold. Then add your loving child telling that you’re a “bad parent” because you forgot to set your alarm. You have the start of a recipe for a disastrous day. I felt like I was in knots.

The above episode is just one layer of the tangles that entwined my day. I was still reeling from my emotional meltdown from last night. For those of you relatively new to The Den, I have clinical depression, which almost borders on being bipolar. I can go from one extreme to the next very quickly when things are incredibly tangled. Some things that really tangle up the ties include not getting enough sleep, not eating well, and constantly feeling isolated.

Mix into this day more tangles from acidic arguments,Β  malodorous moments, and rancid rage. At this point, you can see the taut knot, tightened to the point where it is almost impossible to see where it begins or ends.

How can one even begin to untangle such a tied-up knot like this? I don’t know at this point. Today’s knot has me in a stranglehold.

One thing upon which I can usually rely is music. I have a memory bank of songs that I extract for days like today. Granted, some people say that if one listens to music that is sad, then it will augment the sadness. For me, it is like a security blanket. I know that I can retreat into my music and be comforted by words from other people who understand how I feel.

This song is one of the many I have in my security blanket chest.

(Photo was graciously provided by Mr.Greenjeans by a Creative Commons license, some rights reserved.)

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4 responses

  1. That sounds rough! but then, I don’t know the half of it right? Sometimes when I reach the end of my rope that knot is what keeps me from completely “losing it”!…lol

    Remember to take care of you!

    • Usually they say when you’re at the end of your rope, tie a knot and HOLD ON! You are so right, Alton. πŸ™‚

      Thanks for stopping by! I hopped over to your blog as well. I enjoyed reading your posts. πŸ™‚

  2. I don’t have depression, so I don’t understand from experience the knot you describe, but I totally get how things can just … build on each other. I’m currently a stay at home mom (since I got laid off last Feb; I’m assuming that this is temporary and I’ll eventually find a job) and I find that sometimes it just takes a few minor things to make the whole day go wrong – the baby not napping, or napping at the wrong time; the third grader fighting about doing his homework; the four-year-old having a meltdown over something or other. It’s sometimes hard to get things back to an even keel.

    Hope today is going better for you! πŸ™‚

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